Tips in raising a compassionate and selfless child

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Tips in raising a compassionate and selfless child

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There's a lot of conversation today about raising empathetic, compassionate, accepting, graceful children. And I think that's fabulous. Who doesn't want those kinds of kids? But I think what's more realistic is to say, I'd like to raise an adult who embodies a selfless, grateful, cooperative, compassionate, empathetic human being. Kids are not going to demonstrate those kinds of qualities at young ages. They just have too many other things they're trying to learn how to do, like tie shoes, and not pull their brother's hair when he knocks over the Legos, and how to get mom to help with homework, and is Johnny going to call me tonight, to really be concerned about those huge character traits. But if it's on your radar as a parent, the best thing you can do is embody those traits yourself, to live those traits even when you'd rather have a temper tantrum or scream at the kids, to really look at your own life and say, how often do I act in unselfish ways? How often do I show compassion when I'm stressed out? How often do I walk away from a potential fight even when I'd really like to take the other person down? If you model that, if that's part of who you are, your kids are naturally going to gravitate toward those character traits. And over time, you will see them emerge more and more time and for longer and longer periods. But the real goal is to send an 18 year old out into the world who is well on their way to becoming one of those amazing human beings.

See Vicki Hoefle's video on Tips in raising a compassionate and selfless child...

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Vicki Hoefle

Professional Parent Educator

Vicki Hoefle is a professional parent educator with over 20 years experience teaching parents, educators and caregivers how to raise respectful, responsible and resilient children. Hoefle combines her expertise in Adlerian Psychology and as an International Coaching Federation certified coach to bring parents Duct Tape Parenting, a sustainable and proactive parenting strategy that provides time-tested tools for harvesting a happy and peaceful family life. Her informative and highly engaging presentation style keeps her in demand as a speaker, facilitator and educator. Hoefle is a mother of six and lives in Middlebury, Vermont.

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