Twins of special needs siblings

Joan Friedman, PhD Psychologist & Twin Expert, shares advice for parents on how to best support twins when one has special emotional or physical challenges and how to help the other overcome survivor guilt
Raising Twins | Twins Of Special Needs Siblings
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Twins of special needs siblings

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The situation where one twin has emotional or physical challenges and requires special attention, it will be it will be difficult for the other twin. It will also be very difficult for the parents. The parents will feel very sad about the consequences of having a compromised twin. They will also feel very guilty and inadequate for the amount of time they have to stay away from the healthy twin. The most important advice is to allow the healthy twin to talk about their feelings. He is going to have angry feelings and resentful feelings, but most importantly, he's going to have guilty feelings. Most people who suffer from survival guilt, you have to allow the healthy twin to talk about the fact that he feels very guilty. He is ending up healthy and his twin has all the problems. Research has shown that when you make room for the healthy twin to express the ambivalence and these feelings, that sibling of the special needs child, grow up to be healthy, tolerant and loving.

Joan Friedman, PhD Psychologist & Twin Expert, shares advice for parents on how to best support twins when one has special emotional or physical challenges and how to help the other overcome survivor guilt

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Joan Friedman, PhD

Psychologist & Twin Expert

Dr. Joan A. Friedman is a prominent and well-respected twin expert who shares her passionate views and insights about twins and their emotional needs with twins and their families throughout the world. The fact that she is an identical twin and the mother of five, including fraternal twin sons, makes her ideally suited to this task. Her commitment to twin research and her treatment of twins of all ages demonstrate the breadth and depth of her skills and experience. She conducts ongoing groups for parents of twins and provides consultation on twin related matters such as school placements, developmental discrepancies, and behavioral issues.

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Transcription: 
The situation where one twin has emotional or physical challenges and requires special attention, it will be it will be difficult for the other twin. It will also be very difficult for the parents. The parents will feel very sad about the consequences of having a compromised twin. They will also feel very guilty and inadequate for the amount of time they have to stay away from the healthy twin. The most important advice is to allow the healthy twin to talk about their feelings. He is going to have angry feelings and resentful feelings, but most importantly, he's going to have guilty feelings. Most people who suffer from survival guilt, you have to allow the healthy twin to talk about the fact that he feels very guilty. He is ending up healthy and his twin has all the problems. Research has shown that when you make room for the healthy twin to express the ambivalence and these feelings, that sibling of the special needs child, grow up to be healthy, tolerant and loving.