Learning to say no

Learn about: Learning to say no from Rona Renner, RN,...
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Learning to say no

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You know there are some people that feel they say no to their kids all the time and there are other parents who find it hard to say no. So first off, it's okay to say no, but how you say it is important. If you're always saying no and you're very angry, you're children will just tune you out and then they'll just be sneaking and do what they want. So practice saying no by adding a yes. No, you can't throw the sand in the sandbox at other people, but yes, you can put it in the pail. No, you can't jump on the couch, but yes, we'll get some pillows for you to jump on and play with. So if you're finding you're saying no all the time, think about whether in fact you're childproofing your house. Perhaps you're saying no because you're trying to get your kids not to touch your fancy china. Well that doesn't make sense. So say no. Say yes. And don't be afraid to be the parent, to be the authority, but include your kids when you can in some of the decisions.

Learn about: Learning to say no from Rona Renner, RN,...

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Rona Renner, RN

Parent Educator

Rona Renner has been a Registered Nurse for 46 years with a wide range of experience in health care. In the last 20 years she has focused her attention on pediatrics, parent education and advocacy, ADHD and learning differences. In 1992, she was trained by Kaiser Permanente Medical Center as a temperament counselor to help parents understand their child's behavior, and she co-wrote the temperament based parenting class manual. In 2002, she founded Childhood Matters, a non-profit organization producing radio shows in English and Spanish. "Nurse Rona" hosted a weekly call-in radio show for over nine years, and has appeared on many television shows, including CNN and 20/20. Rona is the author of Is That Me Yelling, a book aimed to help parents learn how to effectively communicate with their kids by focusing on their child's unique temperament, and their own. She loves working with parents one-on-one, in groups, or in large workshops. Rona is happily married, has four adult children, and two grandsons.

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Transcription: 
You know there are some people that feel they say no to their kids all the time and there are other parents who find it hard to say no. So first off, it's okay to say no, but how you say it is important. If you're always saying no and you're very angry, you're children will just tune you out and then they'll just be sneaking and do what they want. So practice saying no by adding a yes. No, you can't throw the sand in the sandbox at other people, but yes, you can put it in the pail. No, you can't jump on the couch, but yes, we'll get some pillows for you to jump on and play with. So if you're finding you're saying no all the time, think about whether in fact you're childproofing your house. Perhaps you're saying no because you're trying to get your kids not to touch your fancy china. Well that doesn't make sense. So say no. Say yes. And don't be afraid to be the parent, to be the authority, but include your kids when you can in some of the decisions.