What to do if your teen is caught cheating

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Transcription:

Cheating is one of those big issues that is in mostly high achieving teens. The statistics are a little staggering. The higher the students GPA is that they have cheating in High School, which is shocking. The question is, why would they cheat? The better question is, why would they not cheat? When you talk to kids about cheating, they rationalize this in a different way. Everyone is cheating. I've got too much work to do. I'm going to cheat on this test, but then I'm going to go right back and learn the material. It's a lousy teacher. I need to cheat to get into college. Once I get into college, I will stop cheating. They fool themselves in a lot of ways. The only reason not to cheat is because of their integrity. This is the part that parents want to focus on. How do you stay whole when everyone else is doing this. The part of you shouldn't cheat. How do you check in with that part when it's tempting. When a student gets caught cheating, they've been cheating for a while. What we want to do is catch them and set the thermostat back to zero. The first time someone cheats, they are very nervous. They are very anxious. They are scared and sweating. After they have cheated twenty times, they aren't nervous anymore. We want to set it back to zero, so it's new for them again. You have the option to never cheat again. Let's talk about what that would feel like. Let's talk about what it would feel like to be whole. Those conversations will really matter with kids. Often times, as a head of a school, I will bring the teacher into the conversation. I remember one teacher said it brilliantly. She was upset at the student for cheating. She had all sorts of reasons. Then she had that moment where her eyes lit up and said, "I know why they are cheating. You are stopping me from being the best teacher I can be. When I give a test and you give back an A work, I assume you really know it and I move on to the next thing. In reality, the scaffolds are really not there and you are not going to learn the other things and you will have to cheat more." When kids hear that from a teacher, it changes the game. When they realized it's not just about them, but the teacher. What we need to teach our kids is lots of arrows in their quiver about why not to cheat. There has to be a lot of reasons that sustain their own self-esteem about not cheating.

Video Categories: TEEN, Education, Cheating

Learn the best steps for parents to take when your child is caught cheating in school and what leads teenagers to cheat, with advice from Michael Riera, PhD Educator and Author

Transcript

Expert Bio

Michael Riera, PhD

Head Of School, Brentwood School

Michael Riera, PhD, Educator, Author, Media Personality, and Speaker. Michael Riera is the Head of School at the Brentwood School, best-selling author, award-winning columnist, educator, television commentator, and national speaker on issues of children, adolescents, families, and parenting. Mike is the author of Right From Wrong: instilling a Sense of integrity in Our Children, Field Guide to the American Teenager, Uncommon Sense For Parents With Teenagers, and Surviving High School. His most recent book, Staying Connected To Your Teenager, was launched with three appearances on Oprah! For eight years he was the Family Consultant for CBS The Saturday Morning Early Show and also hosted an award winning television show on the Oxygen Network, Life in Progress, as well as his own daily radio show, Family Talk with Dr. Mike. Mike has worked in schools for over 20 years as a head of school, counselor, dean of students, teacher and consultant.