Four ways to find a mentor for your son

Family Counselor Michael Gurian, MFA, shares advice for parents on the benefits of your teenage son having a good peer mentor and four ways to find one for your son
Raising Boys | Advice On How To FInd Your Son A Good Mentor
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Four ways to find a mentor for your son

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You may know, you may sense that role models and mentors are really important to your kids. And you may look at your sons, especially as they are growing into adolescence, and say wow, this guy needs a role model, usually it will be a male role model, that he needs. And you may look around you and you may say I am a single mom, let´s say, or we are a blended family or something but my son does not really connect with the stepdad. I still got to help him find role models, and you are absolutely right. If you had to pick one of three things for adolescent boys, it is going to be role models and mentors. Some things you can do: You can look into Boy Scouts or organizations like that. Obvously, Big Brothers, sometimes they have waiting lists but still look into that. You can go to faith communities. That is really big. Even if you have turned away from a religion, maybe look at it again just to see because there are men who want to mentor. You can also look at putting the boy to work because boys get mentors from work. So if he has some free time and he is spending two or three hours a day on video games, it is time for him to work. So obviously he has got to be 16 or older or if he is like 13, 14, work in someone´s shop with just hanging around. But do something that involves work and involves purpose, the mentors come through that. The last thing you can do is you can look at elders, nursing homes or anything where there are old people. They really want to mentor young people. And so, let them apprentice this son of yours in anything, even if it is building a model, that will form the relationship.

Family Counselor Michael Gurian, MFA, shares advice for parents on the benefits of your teenage son having a good peer mentor and four ways to find one for your son

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Expert Bio

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Michael Gurian, MFA, CMHC

Family Counselor & Author

Michael Gurian is the New York Times bestselling author of 25 books published in 21 languages. He provides counseling services at the Marycliff Center, in Spokane, Washington. The Gurian Institute, which he co-founded, conducts research internationally, launches pilot programs and trains professionals. Michael has been called "the people's philosopher" for his ability to bring together people's ordinary lives and scientific ideas.

 He has pioneered efforts to bring neuro-biology and brain research into homes, schools, corporations, and public policy. A number of his books have sparked national debate, including The Wonder of Girls, The Wonder of Boys, and Boys and Girls Learn Differently!, and The Minds of Boys.



Michael has served as a consultant to families, corporations, therapists, physicians, school districts, community agencies, churches, criminal justice personnel and other professionals, traveling to approximately 20 cities per year to keynote at conferences. His training videos (also available as DVDs) for parents and volunteers are used by Big Brother and Big Sister agencies in the U.S. and Canada.

 As an educator, Michael previously taught at Gonzaga University, Eastern Washington University, and Ankara University.  His speaking engagements include Harvard University, Johns Hopkins University, Stanford University, Macalester College, University of Colorado, University of Missouri-Kansas City, and UCLA. His philosophy reflects the diverse cultures (European, Asian, Middle Eastern and American) in which he has lived, worked and studied.

Michael's work has been featured in various media, including the New York Times, the Washington Post, USA Today, Newsweek, Time, People Magazine, Reader's Digest, the Wall Street Journal, Forbes Magazine, Parenting, Good Housekeeping, Redbook, and on the Today Show, Good Morning America, CNN, PBS and National Public Radio.

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