What Moms can do to get Dads more involved

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What Moms can do to get Dads more involved

Moms can do a lot to help get dads into the parenting thing. In fact, researchers call mothers "the gatekeepers" of father involvement because they play such a crucial role in how involved dads are. That's because, more than half of dads, feel unprepared for fatherhood and nine out of ten times, they turn to their spouse or partner to figure out what to do. Unfortunately, often times, moms discourage dads from becoming involved. That's not, necessarily, that they don't want dads to be involved, but sometimes moms don't realize how important a father's role is. Research show enormous benefits when fathers are involved their kids. These kids do better in every way that we can measure in their lives; behaviorally, cognitively, psychologically, and socially. So it's very important that dads are involved. There are three things moms can do to help dads be involved. The first thing is to really want him involved. Often times, a mom will say, "I want him involved," but then she really communicates that she has staked a claim on the home front. Dad is going to pick up on that and he's going to back off. The second thing is to express confidence in dad's ability. Dads really look to moms for their seal of approval. The third thing is for mom to back off and let dad step in. That's giving up some of the responsibility for the kids. As you do that and back off so that he can step in, it's important not to criticize and judge what he's doing.
ALL PARENTS, Parenting, Family Life

View Will Courtenay, PhD's video on What Moms can do to get Dads more involved...


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Will Courtenay, PhD


Dr. Will Courtenay, “The Men’s Doc,” is an internationally recognized expert in helping boys, men and fathers, and a psychotherapist, consultant, distinguished author, researcher, keynote speaker, radio host, and consultant to and speaker at schools and universities. His new book is titled Dying To Be Men. The American Psychological Association calls him, “a leading psychologist in the field of masculinity” and Who’s Who in America calls him a “foremost achiever in his field.” As one of the world’s leading innovators in the health of boys and men, he has a documented history of success in shaping and promoting this new field, as well as new perspectives on fatherhood, boyhood, and masculinity. Dr. Courtenay received his PhD from the University of California at Berkeley and has served on the clinical faculty in the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and the University of California, San Francisco, Medical School. He is the Founding Editor of the International Journal of Men's Health. Dr. Courtenay is a powerful, effective voice about boys and men, heard nationally on radio and television – including CNN, Good Morning America, World News, Fox News, ABC News, NBC News – and seen in print – including NY Times, LA Times, Wall Street Journal, U.S. News & World Report, NPR, Newsweek, USA Today, and Chicago Tribune. Dr. Courtenay is a contributor to Esquire Magazine.

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