Explaining a miscarriage to your children

Grief and Loss Specialist Claire Chew Gillenson, MA, shares advice on how to best explain your miscarriage to your children in a way they will understand and not fear
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Explaining a miscarriage to your children

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And explaining miscarriage to your children, especially young children, below the age of six, it’s really important to be honest and really keep the conversation simple. Children at a very young age often have some challenges grasping death. Sometimes they feel like a person has died and that person is going to come back. And so it’s important to be literal. So however resonates for you, use really simple languaging and terms. You might choose to say something such as, “The baby was sick and the baby had a hard time breathing and is not breathing anymore. The baby is not alive,” versus saying that the baby got sick and went away. Explaining death to children in that way often involves maybe rounds of dialogue and not just one. And so be really open to perhaps going to the library and getting some books out that talks about children and loss and then sitting down with your child and using story telling as a way of communicating and to answer questions with them and to provide that safe space. And most importantly, just really reassure your children that you’re going to be present and that you’re not dying or going away any time soon.
PREGNANCY, Miscarriage and Loss

Grief and Loss Specialist Claire Chew Gillenson, MA, shares advice on how to best explain your miscarriage to your children in a way they will understand and not fear

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Claire Chew, MA

Grief & Loss Specialist

Claire Chew is a Life Transformation/Grief Coach based in Los Angeles, serving clients locally in Southern California and globally via Skype. Her work has been featured in Marie Claire, InStyle, Martha Stewart's Living, Body + Soul, and on Good Morning America. Claire brings an integrative approach to her life coaching, melding Eastern and Western philosophies with a focus on the whole of our being: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Her proven methods help empower individuals to create their own joy and happiness while moving through life transitions. Claire specializes in grief that is not part of mainstream conversations: pet loss, miscarriage, pregnancy loss, suicide and recovery. A published author, speaker and educator, she is the founder of Luxepets.


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