Tween Touchpoint: Acting like a moody teen at ten

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Tween Touchpoint: Acting like a moody teen at ten

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Parents are often surprised to see their 9 and 10 year old acting like a teenager. They come to me and they say "Oh my God, they are this difficult when they are 9 or 10 what it's going to be like when they are 15 or 16"? and what I say is, it won't be like these because you probably actually are at 9 or 10 already seeing some of the early signs of puberty but it will change over the next couple of years. So at 9 or 10 and it's often earlier for girls and for boys, what is really common to see is the kind of wearnerly, nasty, irritability. Where the child flies off the handle of the least little thing and has a much harder time settling herself back to him. Anything you say just throws them off. And unfortunately, these kind of irritability goes along with a new ability to know how to push the parents buttons. And this is the touch point of development, they are falling apart because of the hormones that are already beginning to increase. And they've got a new cognitive capacity to understand you in ways that they couldn't before. And as a result, they can get under your skin. And what happens is that it's harder for you as a parent to help them settle themselves down when they irritable because they've just made you so mad and yet that is the key to getting all the way through adolescence. It is to hold on to the relationship no matter what.

Watch Joshua Sparrow, MD's video on Tween Touchpoint: Acting like a moody teen at ten...

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Joshua Sparrow, MD

Child Psychiatrist & Author brazeltontouchpoints.org

A child psychiatrist, Dr. Sparrow’s care in the 1990s for children hospitalized for severe psychiatric disturbances, often associated with physical and sexual abuse, and for developmental delays aggravated by social and economic deprivation, prompted his interest in community-based prevention and health promotion. At the Brazelton Touchpoints Center, his work focuses on cultural adaptations of family support programs, organizational professional development, and aligning systems of care with community strengths and priorities, and has included collaborative consultation with the Harlem Children's Zone and American Indian Early Head Start Programs, among many others. He has lectured extensively nationally and internationally on related topics and has consulted on media programming for children and parents, including PBS’s Frontlines and Discovery Kids. Co-author with Dr. T. Berry Brazelton of 8 books and the weekly New York Times Syndicated column, “Families Today,” Dr. Sparrow has also served as a contributing editor to Scholastic Services’ Parent and Child magazine. In 2006, he revised with Dr. Brazelton Touchpoints: Birth to Three, 2nd Edition and in 2010, co-edited Nurturing Children and Families: Building on the Legacy of T. B. Brazelton, a textbook on the ongoing generativeness of Brazelton’s seminal research in a wide range of fields. Dr. Sparrow has authored numerous other scholarly works, teaches and lectures nationally and internationally, and is frequently called upon for his expertise by national and international media. Prior to attending medical school, Dr. Sparrow worked for several years as a preschool teacher and journalist in New York City.

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