Advice for grandparents
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Corky Harvey, nurse and lactation experts shares helps tips of how to balance grandparents and raising your baby, especially with breastfeeding and sleeping tips.
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Grandparents today often don't often live near us and that is kind of one of the sad parts of having a baby, because we really need them to help us. In times past, women were always surrounded by the grandparents, the aunties in that village, and you were cared for the first months of that baby's life. But it can be a good thing and it can be somewhat of a not good thing at times, because the grandparents sometimes give advice that isn't helpful. So when a mother comes to us and says, "My mother is telling me that I am feeding my baby too often, I shouldn't pick them up," etc., that is really not helpful, and what we need grandparents to do is learn what's going on today. We actually have classes for grandparents, and we asked them, "what's the most different thing today?" The first thing that comes up is the sleeping position. Babies are to be on their backs now, and we were told with great fear that we had to put babies on their stomachs all the time. So learning what's different today would be fabulous. A big study was done on what mothers really want from grandmothers in regards to breastfeeding, and what they wanted those grandmothers to be is advocates of breastfeeding, which involved learning. So you can go to a class, you can read a book and learn about breast feeding. And they wanted empowering help and suggestions. They wanted to be encouraged. So what's very important is that you not criticize, not make your daughter feel like a poor parent because that's what the message is when you say those kinds of things. So the opposite thought is how does a daughter deal with these kinds of problem. She needs to provide that grandparent with information. Sometimes she can't do that face to face. So we encourage them to even write a letter and provide some information. We're happy to provide information on breast feeding. Bring her to a class with you. Bring her to a lactation consultation. Let her learn so that she can be a part of your life. And remember, grandparents, you main job is to provide the help, buy the groceries, fix the food, do the laundry and tell your kids how great they are.
Corky Harvey, nurse and lactation experts shares helps tips of how to balance grandparents and raising your baby, especially with breastfeeding and sleeping tips.
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Corky Harvey, MS, RN, IBCLCCertified Lactation Consultant
Corky Harvey is a co-founder of the Pump Station & Nurtury™ - the first new parent resource center of its kind. She is a registered nurse with a master's degree in maternal/newborn Nursing, and an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant. She teaches breastfeeding and baby care classes, facilitates the New Mother Breastfeeding Support Groups, and is a frequent guest lecturer. Corky has three grown children who were breastfed and she loves to claim that their intelligence is linked to this. Corky has two grandsons, Diego who nursed over two years, and 18-month-old Axel who is still breastfeeding.
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