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Allowing room for regression in older child when new baby comes

Posted June 10, 2013 - 7:03pm
Regarding welcoming a second (or more) baby into the home and preparing our older children for the transition, in the last few seconds of this video, I feel he hit the nail on the head. Yes, we know that we should talk up "big brother" and "big sister" status to our older children, but I think it's a key point he makes when he says we have to allow room for regression and allow our older child to show us the parent that they still need us and assurance of our love. Our kids won't be perfect; they'll act out and may not even know why they are. But simply knowing that it will come and that it is normal is a little bit of help when the moment arises. And hopefully we'll all remember that they need this moment to still be the baby and it won't last and we'll be able to get through it without anger.

Video related to this forum:

Joshua  Sparrow, MD
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Child Psychiatrist & Author brazeltontouchpoints.org
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JamieWalker
Yes! One thing I did was whenever my first born asked to sit on my lap, even if there was "no space" and I was nursing her new baby brother and it was uncomfortable, I always said, "Yes!" and let her climb on my lap and try to fit in somewhere. She would eventually jump off (because, of course, it was uncomfortable!) but I think it really helped with the transition by letting it be her choice!