Expert tips on pros and cons of stronger authority for challenging kids

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Expert tips on pros and cons of stronger authority for challenging kids

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You know, a lot of adults, their first instinct if their child has behavioral challenges and the behavioral challenges are being manifested in the form of disrespect, swearing, screaming - first instinct for a lot of adults is to lower the boom. Be even stronger of an authority figure. That often makes things worse. That often is like throwing fuel on the fire. When you recognize that the child is exhibiting those behaviors in response to specific unsolved problems, problems the child is having difficulty managing on his own, demands the child is difficulty meeting on his own, when we realize that is about lagging skills, then it becomes crystal clear why lowering the boom wouldn't fix any of what's going on. Guess what else wouldn't fix any of what's going on? What else wouldn't teach the child the skills he's lacking and wouldn't solve the problems that are causing challenging episodes. Stickers wouldn't do it. Time outs wouldn't do it. Detentions wouldn't do it. Suspensions wouldn't do it. Hitting the kid wouldn't do it. Those things don't make sense any more once we know that child is lacking skills, and those lagging skills are getting in the child's way under very specific conditions called unsolved problems.

See Ross W. Greene, PhD's video on Expert tips on pros and cons of stronger authority for challenging kids...

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Ross W. Greene, PhD

Psychologist, Author & Researcher

Ross W. Greene, Ph.D., is the author of the well-known books The Explosive Child and Lost at School, and the originator of a model of care (now known as Collaborative & Proactive Solutions) emphasizing collaboration between kids and adults in resolving the problems contributing to children’s behavioral challenges.  He is also associate clinical professor in the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, on the professional staff at the Cambridge Hospital, adjunct associate professor in the Department of Psychology at Virginia Tech, and senior lecturer in the graduate program in school psychology in the Department of Education at Tufts University.  Dr. Greene founded the non-profit Lives in the Balance to provide free, web-based resources on his model and to advocate on behalf of behaviorally challenging kids and their parents, teachers, and other caregivers.  He lectures widely throughout the world and lives in Portland, Maine, with his wife and two kids.

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