Feeling jealous of my nanny

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Feeling jealous of my nanny

If you’re having feelings of jealousy or inadequacy about your nanny, just know that those feelings are valid. Perhaps you’re having a feeling of guilt, because you have to go to work or take care of something in your family and you have to leave your baby with a caregiver or a nanny. And perhaps that doesn’t feel so good. But just know that if your baby feels happy and content with your caregiver that is a direct correlation to the fact that he has a safe and secure attachment with you. He could not be safely in the hands of another if he didn’t know that you are his primary caregiver. So you need to know that you are the number one person in his life. You go, but you come back. And he needs to know that. Every time you leave, you let him know, “I’m going to work now. I’ll come back in the afternoon.” And when you come back, you’re fully present to him. It’s not about quantity time, it’s about quality time. It’s about the times when you are together, you have interactions that are full of presence – that means you don’t get distracted with the phone, you don’t get distracted with an errand, your bills, your mail – nothing. You are fully present to your baby and in that time he will know how important he is to you.

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Elsa Chahin

Mom and Infant & Toddler Consultant

Elsa Chahin was born in Mexico City and grew up in both the United States and Mexico, feeling at home with both cultures. She is a RIE (Resources for Infant Educarers) Associate, and PITC (Program for Infant Toddler Care) Trainer, working with professionals and parents of babies zero to three. She is a UCLA Certified Lactation Educator; as a Certified Interpreter-Translator, she collaborated in the translation into Spanish of Magda Gerber’s book Your Self Confident Baby and translated and narrated Magda Gerber’s videos “See How They Move“ and “Seeing Infant With New Eyes”, and the audio guide for caregivers.  Elsa is a Certified Teacher of English as a Second Language, passing her Proficiency in English exams at Cambridge and Oxford Universities.  She studied In Budapest, Hungary under the tutelage of Anna Tardos, Dr. Emmi Pikler’s daughter. She has authored several articles and speaks nationally and internationally on the topic of caring for babies with respect.  She serves on the Board of Directors of the Pikler/Loczy Fund USA. Before embarking in her career in infant development, she was a professional ballerina who continues to teach dance to little ones. Above of all, she is a joyous mom!

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