The philosophy of unconditional parenting

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The philosophy of unconditional parenting

Unconditional parenting or, as I call it, unconditional connection; is a practice of staying calm, loving, and connected to our children, no matter how they are behaving. We believe that, if they could, they would. So they are not doing something that we ask them to do, then they need some help. We move in and help them keep our limit. There is an old practice of making our children obey, no matter what. This can make our love conditional. Sometimes, we even make them leave our presence if they don't behave in the way we expect them to or demand that they do. Unconditional parenting is necessary for optimal brain development. We are the sculptors of our children's brains. This practice of staying unconditionally connected, is not easy. We may not have been parented that way, and we may have to heal our own hurts. But not only will it create an atmosphere of of cooperation and peace in our families, but I believe it will change the world.

View Kathy Gordon's video on The philosophy of unconditional parenting...


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Kathy Gordon

Parent Educator

Kathy Gordon is the single adoptive mother of a very spirited nine year-old boy, but was not prepared for the challenges of parenting a child whose brain was developed under stress. When her son was three, Kathy had the good fortune of taking parenting classes with Ruth Beaglehole, founding Director of the Center for Nonviolent Education and Parenting, (, and she realized this powerful compassionate method of working with children was something she wanted to teach. She has been a teacher, director and coach most of her adult life. Kathy was certified as a Parent Educator through the Center for Nonviolent Education and Parenting in May of 2008, and will now continue her training by becoming a Certified Hand-in-Hand Parenting Parent Educator. Kathy works with families individually, teaches parenting classes and facilitates trainings for educators and schools communities. Her practice is called Unconditional Connection because we all long for connection, and we long to be unconditionally loved. We live in a society in which we are continually judged by our behavior. Kathy offers research-based information and tools to help people look underneath and beyond the behavior, so that we may be more unconditionally connected thus creating a world of cooperation and peace. 

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