Preparing for the sexual pressures of middle school

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Preparing for the sexual pressures of middle school

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The way you prepare your children for the sexual pressures in middle school is twofold. Number one, those conversations have to be 30 second snippets. You can't just sit there and have the five or ten minute talk. That's when they roll their eyes and shut you out within the first 30 seconds. It has to be a successive series of 30 second snippets about information. That information needs to entail, what is the game? How is it played? Especially if you have a girl. You want to tell them how boys play the game. What are they going to do? Are they going to say, what are they going to do, to try and get you to do the things that they want you to do? What I tell the parents, and I tell the kids in my office, is that guys at this age start beginning puberty and they are releasing so much more testosterone. Literally, they are thinking with the wrong head. When a guy sees you, he doesn't see you as much as what he wants off of you. What the girls need to do is hold the bar high for themselves and not give guys what they are looking for right off the bat. If you can string them along a little bit, the guys who are players will jump ship to try to find another girl to get what they want. The legitimate guys will respect their boundaries and follow them along respectfully. That is a more legitimate guy that she can try to have a relationship with. I also think that parents, if they are having this conversation with their kid in middle school, they are too late. By Fifth or Sixth Grade, they are already talking to their friends about what is going on. If you want to be proactive with your kid, you've got to do it early.

See Jerry Weichman, PhD's video on Preparing for the sexual pressures of middle school...

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Jerry Weichman, PhD

Clinical Psychologist

Dr. Jerry Weichman is a licensed psychologist and adolescent specialist as well as an author, speaker and parenting expert. His clinical practice at Hoag Hospital's Neurosciences Institute in Newport Beach, California provides a window on contemporary teen and pre-teen behavior.

“Dr. Jerry” as his adolescent patients call him, is a young PhD who really relates to teens, speaks their lingo and has felt their pain. Author of the teen survival guide, How to Deal, and noted media expert on teen issues, Dr. Jerry is focused on helping teens cope with parents, teachers, friends and academic pressure, communicating with them in a way they understand to help successfully navigate the dramas and pressures of adolescence.

Dr. Jerry's popular speeches, lectures and seminars have presented assemblies of students, teachers, parents and administrators with practical approaches on how today’s teens can overcome the trials and tribulations of growing up, from coping with bullying to meeting parental academic expectations to walking away from drugs and other self-destructive behaviors. Jerry also sits on the board of directors for the Bullying Prevention Initiative of California and just recently sat on an expert panel for a screening of the documentary Bully.

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