Managing peer pressure

Learn about: Managing peer pressure from Sheila Kamen, PsyD,...
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Managing peer pressure

If your teen comes to you and says, "But all my friends can do it. Why can't I?" I think the first thing is, rather than telling them, "I don't care what your friends do and if your friends jumped off a bridge, would you too?" Instead, have a dialogue with them about why it is that they really want to do this thing that their friends are doing. Ask them what it means to them. Ask them what their friends will think of them if they do it. And what will their friends think of them if they don't do it. If it's so important to them, and you don't see a reason why it may be dangerous with them or where it could lead to more problematic behaviors later on, be open to allow in your teen daughter to change your mind. This is the time when she's learning how to negotiate, how to be persuasive, and to become independent. If she uses good judgement and can explain to you good reasons for why she wants to do the things she wants to do, maybe, you'll let her do it. And if not, it's okay to settle them in and say, "It's not okay with me." And explain why.

Learn about: Managing peer pressure from Sheila Kamen, PsyD,...


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Sheila Kamen, PsyD

Psychologist & Sex Therapist

Sheila Kamen works with individuals and couples in La Jolla, California.  She works with individuals and couples as a coach and therapist. She specializes in couples therapy, sex therapy, and relationship coaching. She also offers premarital and family building counseling. While she no longer works with children, she does help parents with issues related to children.  Sheila lives in San Diego. 

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