Advice for dealing with mother-guilt
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Author and blogger Jill Smokler discusses the effects of mother guilt on her and shares strategies that she uses to overcome it
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Mother guilt. I don't know a single mother who is not plagued by mother guilt. And I have a really hard time with it myself. I think, I just try to remind myself that the kids will be okay if I have to take a business trip, if I have to leave them with a sitter, they'll survive. And they might even be stronger because they have a mom who has a job and is working and has some space from them. But it's really hard. My son, who somehow named me Scary Mommy in the first place will frequently say, "I wish I never came up with that name because if I hadn't then you would be home and you wouldn't be traveling." And every time he says that it's like a dagger in my heart. And I feel awful that he has to think like that. But I know that if I didn't have this outlet and if I weren't traveling then I would be going insane just around them all the time. So I think I'm a better mother because of it, but it's hard. You want to make your kids happy, and it's very hard to feel like you're disappointing them. But I think it's important for us to maintain our independence and our identity. So I think just keep going forward and let them know you love them and hopefully it will all work out.
Author and blogger Jill Smokler discusses the effects of mother guilt on her and shares strategies that she uses to overcome it
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Jill SmoklerAuthor & Owner, Scary Mommy
What started as an innocent on-line baby book to chronicle Jill Smokler’s stay-at-home days with her children, (Lily, 9, Ben, 7 and Evan, 5) quickly transformed into a vibrant community of parents, brought together by a common theme: Parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. Jill’s honest take on parenting has appeared in numerous publications and on television programs, including The Today Show, The New York Times, Good Morning America, Nightline and CNN.
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