Making "special-time" effective

Laura Markham, PhD Clinical Psychologist, shares advice for parents on how giving daily special time to each child can help you to stay connected with your child and help them deal with daily life
How To Make "Special Time" Effective With Your Kids
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Making "special-time" effective

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One of the best power tools you can use with your child to stay connected, and to help your child deal with daily life is special time. Special time is, preferably, something you do everyday. But you do it whenever you can. You give special time the name of your child. If your child's name is Willa, that's Willa time. And Willa knows that every afternoon, she can look forward to 10 minutes of time with Mommy, or time with Daddy that's just for her. When you're not going to be looking at your phone, you're not going to be tending to her brother. Hopefully, her brother is old enough to listen to an audio book or something to keep him occupied. Or hopefully, there's another parent around with him. You just focus on Willa, and you do whatever Willa wants which builds trust between you . You will find that Willa will ask for special time, and when does she get to have it. If you can't do it everyday, do it every other day. If you have 3 kids, you might do it every third day, and just rotate through your kids. I like to encourage parents that, maybe, every other special time, they decide what to do with the time. An you use that time to rock house with your child, get her giggling, and releasing the anxieties that she naturally builds up about her day. You'll find that after special time, she's going to be much nicer to her brother, so much more cooperative with you, and much happier as a person.

Laura Markham, PhD Clinical Psychologist, shares advice for parents on how giving daily special time to each child can help you to stay connected with your child and help them deal with daily life

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Laura Markham, PhD

Clinical Psychologist

Dr. Laura Markham is the author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting. She earned her PhD in Clinical Psychology from Columbia University and has worked as a parenting coach with countless parents across the English-speaking world, both in person and via phone. You can find Dr. Laura online at AhaParenting.com, the website of Aha! Moments for parents of kids from birth through the teen years, where you can sign up for her free daily inspiration email.  Dr. Laura lives in New York with her husband and her kids, who are now 17 and 21.

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