Why forcing a child to share may not be a good idea

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Why forcing a child to share may not be a good idea

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Society really likes it when kids share, but forcing a child to share can be really disrespectful to the child. Fostering generosity is fantastic, but forcing them to share is really not so good. There are a couple of things that you can do. One is when you are faced with a situation where your child is being encouraged or asked to share, if it looks like your child doesn't want to, you can be the voice for your kid. You know, "I don't think he's really interested in sharing that right now. Maybe you can try asking him later;" or "Maybe there is something else he might be willing to share." Also, honor your child's feelings. It's completely okay. Another good idea is having a couple of boxes at home or areas, but one box that is full of toys that your kid is okay sharing. One box of really special toys that he or she doesn't want to share. So when you have a play date, your child is comfortable with his choices and what is really shareable.

View Gila Brown, MA's video on Why forcing a child to share may not be a good idea...

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Gila Brown, MA, MFT

Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist/ Parenting Expert

A middle school teacher turned child development specialist, Gila Brown, MA, MA, is the creator of Harmony Rules: How to Parent Confidently and Raise Super Kids.  With over 15 years of experience working with kids of all ages, Gila has helped countless parents transform life at home, enjoying a greater sense of peace and more rewarding relationships with their kids. Known for her fluency in ‘kid-speak’, Gila helps parents who are facing regular power struggles by giving them tools and strategies to respond with positive discipline and effective communication.

After receiving her BA from USC, Gila began her career in museum education and family programming.  She went on to receive her MA in human development from Pacific Oaks College, along with a teaching credential. After years of classroom teaching, Gila shifted gears deciding that she could best help kids by helping their parents. As a child development specialist, Gila earned an MA in clinical psychology from Antioch University. Her expertise and background in both education and psychology give her a unique perspective on child behavior and the family system.

Gila is in private practice in Beverly Hills where she works with individual adults and parents.  She also specializes in working with families coping with divorce. Gila teaches parenting workshops through numerous schools and parenting organizations.

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