When your child is the bully
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Michele Borba, EdD Educational Psychologist, shares advice for parents on what to do if they're child is a bully and explains the importance that they take steps to put an end to the behavior
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If you realize that your child is a bully or someone has told you your child is a bully, please take it seriously. It's not a phase. If you allow your child to continue this bullying behavior, it will ruin havoc with his character, his reputation, and his moral fiber.
Instead what you want to do is first get perspective. Get perspective of other people who know your child and are seeing him in different situations because he may be acting differently in another situation than with you. The key question you need to determine is, why? Why is my child resorting to this behavior pattern, this aggressiveness, or this cruelty.
There is no real reason. Your main point is to figure out: Why is my child doing this. First, if you find out it's because he lacks the ability to control his anger, then he needs anger management. If you know that he lacks empathy, then you are going to boost and nurture it. If you know that he's trying to get status or power, then you are going to help him learn social skills.
Of course, you are also going to go and get the help of a psychologist, a teacher, or a counselor at your child's school because it's going to take a whole lot of monitoring, a lot of help. The good news is bullying is learned and can be unlearned. As soon as you start this intervention, the better hope for your child.
Michele Borba, EdD Educational Psychologist, shares advice for parents on what to do if they're child is a bully and explains the importance that they take steps to put an end to the behavior
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Michele Borba, EdDEducational Psychologist
Michele Borba, EdD is a Today Show contributor and recipient of the National Educator Award. She is recognized for her practical, solution-based parenting strategies and is an expert of bullying. Michele is the author of 22 books including Building Moral Intelligence and No More Misbehavin’. She appears as an expert on shows such as Dr. Phil, The View, and CNN and is an advisory board member for Parentsmagazine.
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