The time just before children leave the nest and head off to college can be wrought with contradicting emotions. You’re happy to see them starting an independent chapter of their lives, but you’ll miss them and worry about them. Amidst all of these feelings, make sure you carve out time to talk to your child about the things they’ll need to know to be most successful as they launch out on their own. Here are six topics to think about bringing up before your teen flies the coop.
#1: Surround Yourself with People Who Make Good Choices
In the weeks before your daughter or son heads off to college, talk to them about their soon-to-be freedom and all the choices they’ll have to make. Your child is going to be exposed to many different kinds of people from different walks of life. While this is a good thing in many ways, it can make it challenging to find people who will serve as positive influences. It’s a good idea to help your child think about their values so that they can seek out people whose behavior supports those values.
#2: Take Care of Your Car
Chances are, you’ve helped your teen take care of their car up until now, ensuring the oil gets changed and regular maintenance occurs. When your teenager packs up for college, remind them the car is their responsibility now and go over what its care entails. Ensure they know that neglecting maintenance can add up to costly repairs—or a vehicle that doesn’t run. This conversation will help you feel more comfortable because you won’t be worried about your child stranded on the side of the road somewhere.
#3: Eat Well
Prepare for an eye roll, but talk to your kid about making good food choices anyway. You’ve seen how different foods affect your child. Maybe he gets hangry (hungry and angry) in the afternoons when his blood sugar dips. Maybe she skips breakfast and ends up feeling sleepy around noon. Maybe your child forgets to drink water and then ends up with a headache once in a while. You don’t have to harp, but remind your kiddo of how their eating habits fundamentally affect their health and well-being. They’re going to need their energy to stay alert in class and fulfill their social rights of passages, and these little tips might help.
#4: Manage Your Time
You won’t be there to remind your college student to do their homework every night like you did while they were in K-12. Sit down with your student and talk about time management. Ask some questions to help them reflect on what it will take to be productive and ultimately successful at school. How much time do they expect their reading and assignments to take to complete? What times of day do they feel freshest and most alert? What are some obstacles that could get in the way of getting school work done? This conversation could help keep your child from getting caught off guard when they find out how heavy their course load will be when the new semester begins.
#5: Take Advantage of Counseling Services
Colleges usually have free counseling services available to students, and you should encourage your child to take advantage of it. Even if you don’t think your kid has a “problem,” a counselor can help your child cope with the many transitions they’ll be experiencing. Moving out of their childhood home is a big deal, even for well-adjusted teens. It’s also a good idea for your child to establish a relationship with a trusted adult early on so that they have someone to turn to if a problem does arise during the school year. And, you’ll take comfort in knowing that someone else is checking in with your kiddo regularly while you’re not with them.
#6: Be Careful with Your Credit
Finally, if you haven’t talked to your kid about credit yet, this is the time to start. Many kids go away to college and leave with mountains of debt and decimated credit scores. You don’t want your child to be afraid of credit, but you want them to know how to make wise choices regarding money. You might encourage your child to take out a credit builder loan as a learning experience and a way to build up their credit score.
Hopefully, these tips will help you rest a little easier at night after your young one heads off to college. If you think of other topics to bring up after they’ve already left, jot them down and spend some time thinking about them so you can talk when the time is right. The process of helping your kiddo become an adult is a sprint, not a journey, and you’ll still have plenty of time together to talk about what matters most.
