Has your marriage lost its sizzle? It may start to feel like something you are putting up with instead of enjoying. As time passes, many people start to lose interest in their relationships and partners. The things you used to appreciate become routine. If you could not get enough of each other in the beginning, you suddenly can’t wait to be alone.
Sometimes, this phase only lasts a few weeks allowing you to get back to your happy marriage. However, there are times when you have to put in some effort to revive your marriage. Here are a few incredible ideas to bring some excitement back into your marriage.
Understand That Your Feelings Are Normal
Working on your marriage is easier when you understand that your feelings are normal. Do not beat yourself up when you seem to have lost your spark. Even the best couples face tough times. Do not assume that other couples are having an easier time. Even picture-perfect Instagram couples go through tough times.
Find Out What Changed
Find out when things started going wrong. Even when you are past the honeymoon phase of your relationship, your marriage should not suffer. After some time, the reality of your marriage and partner start settling in. Your sex life diminishes and things start feeling boring and mechanical. However, this does not have to be the case. Be intentional with your actions and ensure that you continue doing the things you used to do. Here are a few tips that may help:
Share parenting responsibilities
Help each other handle the stresses of meetings, quotas, and deadlines
Focus on self-care
Maintain good communication and attentiveness
Talk About It
Almost all issues in marriage can be solved by talking. Let your partner know how you feel and what would make you feel better. Talking builds a bond. It helps you connect and understand each other better. As a married couple, you are always talking about finances, the kids, and dinner plans. However, that isn’t enough. You must set aside time to talk about your feelings and marriage as well. There are plenty of intimate questions to ask your partner. Talk about deep topics and avoid being passive-aggressive. The right ones will make your marriage more exciting.
Don’t Harbor Anger or Bitterness
If you have been looking at your partner through a critical lens, your marriage will suffer. The best relationships are those where you can talk about your feelings. Communicating about issues that hurt or annoy you encourages vulnerability. It builds intimacy and trust.
Put In Effort
Evaluate the amount of effort you are investing in your relationship. Even though losing excitement is normal, it doesn’t need to stay that way. Don’t resign to what you think maybe your new reality. Reconsider the amount of effort you are putting into your relationship and find out how you can do more. You may realize that you aren’t doing as much as you did at the beginning of your marriage.
Most people work out, put on makeup, and care for their appearance at the beginning of a relationship. However, they may start slacking after some time. Your spouse will notice the lack of effort and it will affect your marriage.
If you have stopped going out on dates, getting couple’s massages, or spending time together, start doing it again and your marriage will flourish.
Work On Your Sex Life
Your sex life is an important part of the marriage. If it isn’t great, your marriage won’t be great either. There are many ways to spice up your sex life. Take time to explore each other’s bodies afresh. Pay attention to your partner’s needs over your own, and consider bringing in toys to the bedroom. Calming music in the background and scented candles may also help you set the mood.
While spontaneity in the bedroom is great, you may need to schedule. If you both have busy days, consider making plans for sexy time. Mix things up and avoid falling into a routine in the bedroom.
Recreate Your First Date
One of the best ways to inject some excitement into your marriage is by recreating your first date. Once you have been honest about your marriage and the fact that it needs to change, consider recreating your first date. It is the time when you were most in love and excited for your marriage. It could end in amazing role play sex.
Marriages are great but they take a lot of work. If yours seems to be losing its original spark, you don’t need to quit. There are many ways to bring the spark back and enjoy your marriage. Find out what went wrong and communicate with your partner, and fix it.