Asperger's and social situations

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Asperger's and social situations

Social situations are one of the things that Asperger kids have the biggest problem with, at least our son. He has a hard time looking people in the eye when he speaks. He has a hard time really understanding any other kid's emotions or relating to them whatsoever. So social situations are very difficult, for him and I, because I want to be able to help him out. And what I've found that helps him the most is me staying calm and not getting excited about his problems that he is having because sometimes kids get excited and there's tension. But if I can bring a calming element to that, go over and touch him and get down to his level and speak to him, and explain the situation to him of how the situation evolves and get him to kind of think about it. Because for him, he sees everything as logical. So you can explain things to him, but you can't say, "What are you doing? Why'd you do that?" He doesn't know why. He wants to know the reasons. But if you explain the situation and purely in a factual manner, not with emotions involved, more explain to him, "You just said this to him, and this upset him." That makes much more sense than telling him, "Why'd you say that to him? What are you thinking?" That just doesn't work. But if you explain it to him and make it logical, he's a very logical guy, brilliant mind. But you can't say, "You hurt their feelings." That means nothing to him. But if you explain the things that happened up to that point and why that might have hurt someone, it's much more helpful for him.

See Ron Howell's video on Asperger's and social situations...


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Ron Howell


Ron is a licensed architect, and has been in private practice for 15 years. He attended Cal Poly SLO for his undergrad, and his graduate study was done at the University of Copenhagen. His is the father of three, two sons and a daughter.

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