Staying calm and avoiding overreacting as a parent

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Staying calm and avoiding overreacting as a parent

I think one of the most important ways to be a sane parent is if you have people around you other adults and other parents. That it may be your Mom or you Dad, your Mom and Dad that they can really keep you sane. What I mean by sane is when you are reacting really in an anxious way that you might do something that's really reactive and actually counter productive to your goal and your goal with your kids when there's a problem with your kids or you perceived there to be a problem with your children is 2 things. 1 is, am I teaching my child to be competent? Socially competent in this moment and am I teaching them that what is important to me is to treat people with dignity and worth. Not when everything is nice and getting along but when people are really angry with each other and people are thinking the worst. Am I doing that? Because what happens in this moment were we become the hovercraft parent, helicopter parent ,or the snow plow parent whatever you want to call it. Is it something is happening to our kids that we feel like is like a matter of life or death and you've really got to sit down when you've got that moment and think into yourself; Is somebody going to die in the next 30 seconds and somebody's not going to die in the next 30 seconds you sit your tooshy down and say; Okay, how am I going to connect myself in a way that my child learn social competency and living with dignity and then when you've reacted poorly and God knows what all have as parents that you really need that group around you who can kindly say to you; Yeah right there, that behavior right there that you just did, were you calling the school and sorts of screaming? That was completely out of hand. Love you dearly, you've got it but you've got to stop. No more petitions to the school, no more emails in capitols and all capitols, that’s got to stop. You are a mature adult, you are a good parent, remember what your goals are. Dignity and social competence.

View Rosalind Wiseman 's video on Staying calm and avoiding overreacting as a parent...


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Rosalind Wiseman

Author & Educator

Rosalind Wiseman is an internationally recognized expert on children, teens, parenting, bullying, social justice, and ethical leadership. Rosalind is the author of Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and the New Realities of Girl World, the groundbreaking, fully-revised edition of her bestselling book that was the basis for the movie Mean Girls. Her follow-up book, Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads, addresses the social hierarchies and conflicts among parents and is now being made into a major motion picture by New Line Cinema. In 2010, Rosalind published the  young adult novel Boys, Girls, & Other Hazardous Materials, which was recognized by the American Library Association as one of their Most Popular Paperbacks for Young Adults.  She is now writing a set of companion books for boys and their parents, scheduled for publication in the Fall of 2013. In addition, Rosalind has written the Owning Up Curriculum, a comprehensive social justice program for grades 6-12 which is in widespread use across the country.  She writes the monthly “Ask Rosalind” column in Family Circle magazine, and is regular contributor to several blogs and websites. Also, Rosalind is a spokesperson for LG’s Text-Education Council that aims to inform parents about responsible monitoring of teen cell phone usage. Each year Rosalind works with tens of thousands of students, educators, parents, counselors, coaches, and administrators to create communities based on the belief that each person has a responsibility to treat themselves and others with dignity. In 2011, she was one of the principal speakers at the White House Summit on Bullying.  Other audiences have included the American School Counselors Association, International Chiefs of Police, American Association of School Administrators, and countless schools throughout the U.S. and abroad. National media regularly depends on Rosalind as the expert on ethical leadership, media literacy, and bullying prevention.  She is a consultant for Cartoon Network’s Speak Up, Stop Bullying campaign. She is a frequent guest on the Today Show, Anderson Cooper 360 and Dateline.  She has been profiled in The New York Times, People, Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune, Washington Post, USA Today, Oprah, Nightline, CNN, Good Morning America, and National Public Radio affiliates throughout the country. Rosalind holds a Bachelor of Arts in Political Science from Occidental College. She lives in Washington D.C. with her husband and two sons.

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